Like most people, I love the Christmas season. I really enjoy giving gifts, but it is important to remember that it isn’t all about the gifts. It is almost too easy to get caught up on the monetary side of this wonderful season and forget about the real value of love and togetherness. I want my kids to learn not to expect tons of presents underneath the tree, and to place more value on giving than receiving. This year I plan on teaching the importance of presence over presents.
Presence Over Presents
Now, I am not saying that I won’t get my kids any gifts. I love giving gifts, I just can’t help it. Seeing them light up on Christmas morning because of the gifts under the tree is a large part of the magic for me as a mom. What I am saying though, is that there is a line that we as parents must tow in order to maintain a balance of presence over presents for our kids. It is our job to teach them that while receiving is great, giving is even better, and that while we may want many things, sometimes time is more important. I take my job of raising good human beings very seriously, and while I am by no means a perfect parent, I do my best to raise my children with love and respect. That being said, there are a few ways that I have found that really help me teach the importance of presence over presents.
Teaching Giving Back
Giving back is something I believe we should all be doing all year round. It does seem that it becomes more prevalent during the Holidays though, so this is when I really focus on it with my kids. There are so many ways you can teach the importance of giving back, no matter the age of your kids. One thing that I do is donate good but unneeded items to a local charity. This is something that I get my daughter involved with. Together, we will go through her toys and clothes and pick out items to donate. I always explain to her why we do this as well. She knows these will go to other kids who need the toys and clothes more than she does. The more often we do this, the more I can see her really grasping the concept of donation and why we do it. She even has started to enjoy doing it.
Another things we do, is something that we do as a family multiple times a year. My husband, who is former Army National Guard, cooks for the Fisher House a few times a year. The Fisher House is a wonderful organization that reminds me of a Ronald McDonald House but specifically for military families. My daughter always goes with my husband to drop off the food when we cook.
There are so many ways to give back all year round. Giving back within your local community and involving your children can really help teach them that it is their presence that truly matters in this world.
Give The Gift of Experience
Gifts are all good and fun. What little girl doesn’t want a bunch of My Little Pony toys under the tree? While toys are good and fun, experiences are the best gifts. One thing we love to do is give the gift of travel. Instead of birthday gifts, we will get season passes to Legoland Florida. We will do trips to Disney World instead of a load of Christmas gifts. Experiences can be wonderful gifts because they allow you and your whole family to really bond. These don’t even have to be elaborate or expensive. Trips to the bowling alley or a local amusement park or museum. Experiences are one of my favorite things to gift.
Expensive Gifts Aren’t Always Worth It
Lastly, I think it is important for us as parents to realize that expensive gifts aren’t always worth what we have to sacrifice to get them. Working overtime in order to afford expensive gifts? To me, that isn’t worth it. I would much rather spend that time with my kids and pass on getting them on the “big gift”. We only have so much time on this planet so we need to make the most of it. Our kids are only little for such a short amount of time as well. I know personally, I don’t remember the gifts I got as a kid. I remember the time I spent with my family. The love that I felt and the experiences we were able to have together.
So this Holiday season, and all seasons after, we need to remember the importance of presence over presents. Let’s teach our kids to be loving and caring humans. It is time to really give back and teach the next generation the importance of giving. Let’s spend time with our kids, give them experiences that they will never forget.
this is such great advice for parents and people in general. I have tried teaching my son that the best gift he can give is his time and himself to help others and to be a good person.
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It is so special to teach kids the power of giving and just raising good little people 🙂
I love this!! Christmas has become more about what’s under the tree than who’s around it, and what the real meaning is. I also love the gift of experiences/
Joanna @ Everyday Made Fresh recently posted…Eggnog French Toast Casserole
I totally agree. I mean I love giving gifts but I love experiences as gifts. And teaching the little ones to give back is really important me
I am such a fan of the gift of travel. A great way to experience different cultures and see the world.
serena recently posted…Chocolate Peppermint Cupcakes
This is such an important lesson as a parent to teach your children. I love this post and all parents should read it!
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Love the theme of this. It is not a new idea that there is too much commercialism in these holidays and the more expensive the better. It is great that you try and get your kids to think more about relationships than gifts.
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We try to stress the importance of giving to our son. We do volunteer work as a family and he really likes it.
this is a fantastic message and I agree with you 100%. there is so much going on in the world today we need to be more present.
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You’re post reminded me of the lesson from the Grinch, my favorite Christmas story:
“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store? What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more?”
We just watched that with our daughter the other night! I love the movie!
So much YES! My husband and I have been trying to stress this to each other this year. We just have so much stuff, and our kids are so much happier with actual time spent together. We are giving a trip as a gift and we are so excited! Such a great message!
I love this! It is so important to teach children and adults alike that it isn’t just about the presents under the tree. Giving back is so important and it feels good to do so.
Laura @ MommyDearest recently posted…12 Days of Christmas Day 8: Handmade Gifts
As a mom I totally agree. I love seeing my kids get so excited over gifts, but I also try to teach them that there is so much more than gifts. I make sure that they donate toys and clothes to those in need, and understand the importance of giving to others, and the joy it will bring them.
I really love this post! I think its so easy to forget about the importance of being present. My daughter’s father emphasizes presents over the presence and I want her to know that it isn’t about getting everything you want but giving to those who aren’t as fortunate! She’s only one but I definitely look forward to teaching her and showing her how to be the best person she can be!
it’s so easy to get caught up in the the hustle of the season and forget about the true meaning. My family has a few things lined up for the next week to change that!
It really is easy to get caught up with gifts…I know I’ve done it myself lol
I am loving not having the pressure of not having to buy tons of presents. I just had to refocus and re-frame my own perspectives on Christmas.
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YES! I totally feel you on this one mama. Recently we did a ‘seniors angel tree’ gift with my kids. They loved going around the shop and picking out the different things that were on this seniors wish list. I love the idea of giving these kinds of gifts to our children.
How awesome! It is so great to give back
I absolutely love this post. Doing something more than gifts gives the holidays a whole new meaning. Creating memories, experiences are all that stay with you forever. Wonderful post.
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No matter how expensive your gift is for this year, they’ll probably forget about it the next year. It’s really nice to give the gift of experience! But I agree, I’m also not going to skip wrapping presents for the kids, it’s just that there are more things to teach the kids this season!
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Totally, I love giving my kids gifts…just not going into,debt doing it lol I know with my daughter the things she remembers are,the trips.. Which is why we are Doing legoland for her birthday instead of gifts
I couldn’t applaud this post more. We all love getting gifts, especially the kids, but it’s also to remember that there a lot of people who aren’t as fortunate you are. Giving, whether time or gifts, is a nice way to help others while also doing good.
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This has been something that has been heavy on my heart for a few years. My older children go help shop and wrap gifts for a local children’s home every year. I can’t wait for my middle daughter to start helping out as well.
This is so wonderful and I really need to be better this season about teaching this to my daughters!
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